Bitesized Not Quite Reviews Of Perfume-Themed Books: No 1 - The Rottweiler By Ruth Rendell

I guess with a title like The Rottweiler, any kind of review - or even a not quite one such as this - was bound to be "bitesized", in a manner of speaking. I must firstly confess to not having read much of anything lately. This has been partly due to the upheaval of moving and the cat being ill, but equally to the fact that the central heating system at Bonkers Towers is seriously underpowered. Compound this with an original Edwardian cast iron bath that turns hand hot water to barely tepid in a matter of seconds, and you have a recipe for showers. Or you would do if I had one. In this instance you merely have a recipe for Very Business-like Baths. And before you ask (very reasonably) what all this has to do with a thriller boasting a perfume theme, the thing is that I do most of my reading in the bath, or used to at the old house.

So it has taken me almost nine months to read this book and finally finish it. In truth I think I would have made speedier progress - in or out of the bath - if it had been more engrossing. I am a big fan of the thriller genre as a rule: I devour all those Kathy Reichs with "Bones" in the title, for example, and equally enjoy sensationalist TV programmes of what ex-Mr Bonkers used to take pleasure in calling the "forensic prostitute" genre, on the basis that the killers' victims were very often ladies of the night.

Not so in The Rottweiler, as the murderer is dubbed. He does murder young women - a whole clatter of them indeed - and takes an item of jewellery from their dead body as a trophy. Curiously, he doesn´t do any biting, just garotting, so the name of the book is a bit of a misnomer. And by the same token, though the novel does indeed have a perfume theme - central to the MO of the killer, no less - it doesn´t make its appearance till about Page 320, by which point I have long since lost interest in the otherwise lacklustre characters and plot. Which is a shame, as the revelation of the perfume connection is dark and deeply disturbing when it comes.

Yes, from Page 1 I was keeping an eagle nostril out for references to fragrance, and apart from a few desultory mentions of so-and-so wafting this or that unspecified scent before them, there is very little for a perfumista to get their teeth or nose into. I do recall one character sporting a tuberose scent by Jo Malone (I didn´t know there was one - on the face of it this sounds like an olfactory contradiction in terms!), but that is about it, till you get past Page 300, as I say.

So I would say give this book a miss, belated shocking perfume-themed denouement and all. I like thrillers, and I usually like the work of Ruth Rendell, but this book signally fails to grab me by the jugular.

A Very Fine Cat Used To Live Here: RIP Charlie Bonkers

For the benefit of any regular readers of Bonkers about Perfume who are not also my friends on Facebook, I am breaking this latest hiatus to mention the sad news that I had to put Charlie Bonkers down last month. She was suffering from a triple whammy of ailments, namely chronic kidney disease, deafness, and feline cognitive dysfunction (the cat equivalent of Alzheimer's), and had a pretty poor quality of life. If I am being perfectly honest, owing to Charlie's blood curdling bouts of nocturnal wailing, I was chronically sleep deprived towards the end and wouldn't describe my own quality of life as all that great. However, the decision to let the cat go at the time that I did was primarily to spare her further suffering. For Charlie was drinking and eating very little by this stage, being sick a lot, and had taken to adopting a dejected pose with her head hung over the edge of the bed she slept on. I have since learnt from feline renal forums (you know there had to be some!) that this is called the "Meat Loaf Position", and is typically a sign that the cat is "crashing" ie entering the final stage of the illness.

So the neighbour who had fed Charlie for the past twelve years and I took her to the vet's together, where we gave her as loving and peaceful a send off as anyone could have wished for.

CHARLIE ENJOYING THE GARDEN EARLIER THIS SUMMER - A SORT OF POLE CAT?

In the immediate aftermath of this final trip to the vet, I was deeply touched by the deluge of good wishes I received on Facebook and in emails from friends, real and virtual. Yes, I guess only 30%? of the well-wishers have met me in the flesh, and probably only 10% at most have met the cat herself, yet the messages of sympathy and support kept coming and I felt greatly buoyed up by them during that first very difficult week. So to anyone reading who was part of that outpouring of kindness, thanks very much again - it meant a lot to me.

A special word of thanks goes to Tara of Olfactoria's Travels for sending me a "condolence travel vial" of one of my favourite perfumes - that I don't even own! - namely Ormonde Jayne Ta'if, to Anna from Edinburgh for the chocolate and aromatherapy oils while Charlie was ill, and to my friend Gillie (she of my birthday herb garden challenge) for making me this commemorative tile. I know the photographs show the tile laid on a rug, but I am going to place it in the porch by the front door, as a memento of Charlie Bonkers, a very fine cat who used to live here. It was only for four months sadly, but I am glad she made the move to the new house - Charlie helped me settle into this new chapter of my life and will be much missed.

Bonkers In Belgium: Part 3 - A Bunch Of Mostly Oud-y Things At Senteurs D'Ailleurs, Brussels, And The Perfect Scents For Your LBD (Sticky Tape Not Supplied!)

Belgium, though a small country, punches above its weight in terms of numbers of niche perfumeries, and this post recounts my remaining solo sniffing sessions during the three day trip last August. Victoria and I had thought of spending the afternoon of our day together at Senteurs d’Ailleurs, a high end fragrance and cosmetics store in Brussels, but we ended up not leaving her flat! So after checking out of my hotel the following day, I set off in the car for Place Stéphanie, and instantly regretted my decision to drive. For I soon became snarled up in traffic gridlock caused by the inevitable road works and diversions everywhere I turned. My satnav was in meltdown and I wasn’t far behind it. In the end, I conceded defeat and abandoned the car in a side street. More by luck than judgement, Senteurs d’Ailleurs was only about 10 minutes’ walk away, and soon I was browsing the fragrance fixtures of its cool, onyx-clad interior.

A BUNCH OF MOSTLY OUD-Y THINGS

As with my visit to La Place Vendôme, I have kept the scent strips from that day, and it is apparent from the scribbled names on them that I mostly smelt a bunch of oud-y things. This is not because I am particularly partial to oud as a note – on the contrary – but because most of the new scents that I spotted happened to showcase the blessed stuff, so I sniffed them merely in the spirit of getting with the program, as it were:

The Different Company Oud Shamash
The Different Company Oud for Love
Byredo Oud Immortel
Byredo Accord Oud
Maison Kurkdjian Oud
Heeley Agar Wood

Tip for The Different Company – if you want to be different, maybe lay off the oud next time…?

I also tried a couple more Byredos that were new to me (Mister Marvellous and Seven Veils), plus the clean and forgettable Pure Virgin from The Different Company. None of these featured oud as far as I recall, but that alone was not enough to endear them to me.

MONA DI ORIO ETOILE DE HOLLANDE

My other important discovery in Senteurs d’Ailleurs was Mona di Orio’s Etoile de Hollande, a refined and retro woody rose in the general vein of Lyric Woman / Portrait of a Lady / Guerlain Rose Nacrée du Désert - which is to say, not really my style. But I could appreciate its elegance nonetheless, and there was a certain piquancy about trying a scent with Holland in the name in another one of The Low Countries... : - ) Plus the blotter smells rather wonderful nearly three months later...

Notes: Bergamot, White Peach, Heliotrope, Bulgarian Rose, Turkish Rose, Geranium, Clove, Patchouli, Cedar, Vanilla, Bezoin, Ambre, Balsam

One thing that struck me during my visit to Senteurs d’Ailleurs is that when I was alone at the back of the store, one of the staff immediately found a reason to come and fiddle with the stock in that section, possibly because they didn’t trust me not to have one of the testers away in my copious tote bag, or so it seemed to me...they did let me take photographs, mind, so credit where credit’s due.

ANNICK GOUTAL NEROLI & NUIT ETOILEE

Next up I popped into Annick Goutal over the road to try out one of Victoria’s favourite scents, Neroli, which – as she explains in a review of this scent from 2011 - she appreciates for the delicate interplay of neroli and orange blossom absolute:

“Orange blossom is darker, richer and more voluptuous, while neroli is greener and fresher. Their complementary qualities make for a particularly multifaceted orange flower accord. The composition is accented with aromatic basil and bergamot, while vanilla and cedarwood create a smooth, polished base.”

I could see why Victoria was so taken with Neroli, and wouldn’t have minded a sample of it, however, my main focus on the sample scoring front was to blag one of Nuit Etoilée instead, despite being rather intimidated by the beautifully made up sales assistant. I got lucky! I was delighted to find that I liked Nuit Etoilée very much. The minty opening was shortlived – and it didn't even bother me it as I'd feared it would. Also, despite the resinous notes of the base, the overall vibe of the scent was very refreshing and crisp, clean and citrusy, and I would defy anyone not to like it, which I don’t say of many scents. I thought it would be more “Blair Witchy” like Ormonde Jayne Woman, but not at all. For a forest-inspired scent, there was an unexpected softness rather than a prickle of pine needles. It was a “forest scent for wimps”, just the way I like them…

PARFUMERIE GUTMANN, WAREGEM

When I finally managed to drive out of Brussels – after a catalogue of wegomlegging woe, the tortuous nitty gritty of which I will spare you - I made it to my next port of call, Waregem, just before the shops closed. There was a rather gaudy funfair in full swing in the market square, but I headed straight for Parfumerie Gutmann, drawn to its window by this remarkable mannequin, a novel window dressing idea designed to illustrate the Guerlain fragrance, La Petite Robe Noire. Though in my view the frock, which had been carefully studded with miniature perfume bottles of every brand and shape, was a work of art in its own right... For when it comes to choosing a perfume to accessorise your little black dress, don’t believe anyone who tells you "less is more".

Senteurs D'Ailleurs
Place Stéphanie 1A
1050 Brussels
Belgium
Tel: +32 2 511 69 69

Photo of Etoile de Hollande from Fragrantica, other photos my own.

Bonkers In Belgium: Part 2 - Straight To (Birgit) Heaven - Haute Parfumerie Place Vendôme, Wevelgem

You know it is high time you blogged again, when the spam comments blow across - and alight upon - your archived posts like tumbleweed. It is fair to say that I have had a lot of distractions lately, between the day job (on those days when I had one!), the cheeky cameo appearances of woodworm, the ongoing home improvement mayhem and the ever more imperious demands of a sick and geriatric cat. But still, I felt it was time to get back to Bonkers on a less intermittent basis.

This post picks up the thread of my solo sniffing exploits in Belgium, following a most enjoyable day in Brussels with Victoria of Bois de Jasmin. Some two and a half months on, I sense this will by no means be a straightforward exercise, but I did jot down the odd observation at the time, and I still have the umpty zillion scent strips I acquired left and right, most of which smell of nothing much now, while some of the scent names I have scribbled on them are also on the impenetrable side.

But anyway, here goes...For the other standout highlight of my trip was without question my visit to the Haute Parfumerie Place Vendôme in Wevelgem, for the heads up about which I have Birgit of Olfactorias Travel to thank. I remembered that she had bought a number of high end bottles from there and was curious to take a closer look.

The ironic thing is that I was in Wevelgem on business several times over the course of last summer, and in some other towns with which I persist in confusing it such as Waregem, Desselgem and Zwevezele (okay, so they may not sound that similar on the face of it, but I managed to get them mixed up anyway!). And last year as I bombed up and down the Kortrijk corridor I had no clue that such a gem of a perfumery existed - I bet I drove right past it at least once. Now this is easy enough to do, for Wevelgem itself is not awfully memorable, not compared to the tourist meccas of Bruges and Gent. The very street where Place Vendôme is located has its fair share of pizza takeaways, garages and other humdrum business premises. And you are of course welcomed to the town by the obligatory diversion or "wegomlegging" sign, without which no road trip to Belgium would be complete.

Once inside the Place Vendôme perfumery all that changes, and it is like stepping into another world, an Aladdin's cave of exclusive and rare scents. The store (if "store" isn't too pedestrian a word for it) which Place Vendôme most closely resembles is Roja Dove's Haute Parfumerie at the top of Harrods, minus the Arabian Nights boudoir and some of the most recherché fragrances found in that other hallowed temple. Mind you, Place Vendôme seems all the more miraculous and fairytale-like because it is in Wevelgem. Given the lavish opulence of every department in Harrods - of its escalators even! - you would expect a perfumery on the top floor of that iconic emporium to be rather amazing. Here in Wevelgem though, the contrast with the other shops nearby was so marked that the wow factor was necessarily amplified.

As soon as I walked into Place Vendôme, I was warmly greeted by Steven Verstraete, sales associate and friend of the owner, David Depuydt. He proceeded to devote a good couple of hours to my fragrant exploration of the entire store - we tested 35 scents, some of them on fans! - and focused on things I might not have tried, that also bore in mind my personal preferences.

Amouage Bingo

Yes, just moments after my arrival, Steven demonstrated his psychic perfumista powers by correctly guessing my three favourite Amouage scents as Ciel, Reflection and Honour Woman! I have no idea how he did this, as I had only given him the vaguest idea of my taste leanings at that point. I mentioned that I had also had a bit of a rapprochement with Lyric Woman lately - I find it quite wearable in the winter months, certainly.

Interlude Woman - the Messiaen of the Amouage line

My mention of Lyric prompted Steven to inquire whether I had tried the new Interlude scents. I had, at Victoria's, and it was a thumbs down to both. Steven explained that - to take a musical analogy - while Lyric Woman consisted of a single tune, Interlude Woman opened with a cacophony that was nigh on overwhelming, however, the disparate parts of the piece came together in a more harmonious blend some 1-2 hours in. That may well be so, but I am not sure I can be bothered to test this theory out. If Interlude were a piece of music, it would be by Messiaen. I only know of this composer because I got a cheap ticket to a prom concert of his music when I was about 18. It was discordant white noise to me, but I clapped enthusiastically, knowing that my mother was listening to the broadcast on the radio.

Chanel extraits - intense, but not in a bad way

Steven correctly anticipated that my experience with Chanel scents in extrait form would be limited, so we made a beeline for a few familiar scents in parfum form. I have to say that I was pleasantly surprised to find Chanel 22 extrait not as sweet as I remembered the regular strength to be. Steven felt it was more elegant even than No 5, less of a blockbuster production, maybe. I also tried Cuir de Russie in extrait, which wasn't as oily as the EDP - result!

Chanel Coco Noir - not as noir as all that

Staying with the house of Chanel, we lingered for a moment over the promotional display of Coco Noir bottles, which had recently been launched at the time. I had tried it in a perfumery in Waregem the night before, and it had left me distinctly underwhelmed. To my nose it seemed raspy and indeterminate. Steven diplomatically volunteered the fact that the ingredients were very high quality and correspondingly expensive. I said that I didn't doubt it, but to me the result was still a patchouli-forward but otherwise fuzzy mess with a disagreeable grapefruit note going in. Which of course was never going to get past me... We agreed that if any Chanel deserved a black bottle, it wasn't Coco Noir, but rather the classic Coco, the most "baroque" of the line.

Chanel No 19 Poudré - misty over you!

Still on the subject of the Chanels, Steven revealed a fun fact about the difference between the newish Chanel No 19 Poudré and the original version: the original No 19 sprays in a classic horizontal trajectory, while the Poudré dispenses a fine mist in more of a cloud formation. Apparently the difference between the two scents is partly attributable to its spritzing MO. Who knew? It was quite the party trick and I must have a go myself next time I am in Boots.

A Montale (phantom?) pineapple epiphany

Me and Montale have never really clicked. Sibling and Sister-in-law Bonkers are big fans, owning his and her thermos flasks from the line. They were gutted to find the Montale store had disappeared on their last visit to Paris - from that other Place Vendôme, funnily enough. But Steven was determined to show me scents that might challenge and surprise my preconceptions, and a Montale scent showcasing the pineapple note counted as a double challenge. Now the only scent strip I have kept that is a Montale is Embruns d'Essaouira, a spicy marine scent with no pineapple listed amongst the notes; so I am wondering if the pineapple one might have been Soleil di Capri, which is a bit of a fruit cocktail of a scent, though there doesn't appear to be any pineapple in that either. Yet my recall is that the perfume in question had a very strange name, and Embruns d'Essaouira certainly fits the bill from that point of view. I could always drop Steven a line to ask. The pineapple Montale may turn out to have been a fruity chimera...stranger things have been known.

A citrus chariot and a carousel of Shalimars

Here is a photographic palate cleanser for you. I never fathomed the exact purpose of the lemon trolley, though Steven said that he and his colleagues were very drawn to the fruit, and liked having lots to hand. Come to think of it, I am the same with wool, so I can relate.

CITRUS CHARIOT

SHALIMAR CAROUSEL (PARFUM INITIAL)

Cartier Heure Vertueuse and Déclaration d'un Soir - sneaky sniffs of upcoming launches

Well, I say a sneaky sniff, as the scents had not been released at the time of my visit. However, given the tardiness of this post, both perfumes will surely be in the public domain by now. I wouldn't be surprised if they were all over Debenhams like a rash. Well, I exaggerate...but in the likes of Harrods and Harvey Nicks, certainly. Anyway, Heure Vertueuse features lavender and miscellaneous other herbs, but the lavender was well blended such that I didn't recoil instantly, as I did with Chanel Jersey. (So glad I didn't try that one in extrait form.) I imagine Vertueuse would appeal to lovers of Guerlain Sous Le Vent or the numbered colognes from Sisley. I have written on the blotter "3 o'clock at night" so I assume that that must be the "heure" allocated to this one. Déclaration d'un Soir I remember as a rose scent for men, which was rather pleasant in an oud-y Portrait of a Lady kind of way. More rose-y than oud-y even. The blotter actually still smells of it, so I can state with confidence that this one is quite scrummy after 10 weeks.

Guerlain Cologne du Parfumeur - my new favourite cologne!

Steven truly had my number when he invited me to sample this refreshing cologne. Up till now my reference cologne had been the one in the Chanel Exclusives range, but Cologne du Parfumeur has pipped it, and I am kicking myself for not asking for a sample. Whilst googling more information on the scent, I came across a review of it on Basenotes by Persolaise, which sums up my thoughts exactly. This is as happy a summer fragrance as you could wish for, perfect for the warm August day on which I tested it.

"Many consider Chanel's Les Exclusifs Eau De Cologne to be the epitome of this genre, and whilst I agree that it's an impressive piece of work, I also think it could do with being a bit more cheerful. Wasser's effort is a smile in a bottle, giving you just what you want in every spritz: an instant, uncomplicated lift."

Steven desconstructed its appeal for me - a nifty fusion of white flowers, citrus notes and musk in a base he referred to as "muscinade", a lighter take on the classic "Guerlinade"!

Guerlain Les Déserts d'Orient range

Now thanks to Birgit, I had already tried one of this trio - Guerlain Rose Nacrée du Désert - which was another one of these refined, elegant woody roses that don't really excite me for some reason - maybe because I don't see myself as the refined elegant target wearer : - ). And now here I was in front of a gorgeous display of the full trio, and got to try the other two, Encens Mythique d’Orient and Songe d’Un Bois d’Été. The latter had an innocuous opening, but became rampantly animalic as it wore on, Amouage Tribute Attar-stylee, while the former was a woody, spicy incense-y number, but perfectly wearable, even to a relative wimp around incense like me. The whole range is a big seller in The Middle East (no surprises there), with Encens Mythique a particular favourite if my memory serves me - and why ever should it after all this time?!

Guerlain Les Parisiennes Mon Précieux Nectar

Birgit had also given me a sample of this one earlier in the summer, and I know she loves it - owns it, indeed! - but try as I might, I couldn't get into it on a retrial at Place Vendôme. It was too musky I think, and the orange notes were not sufficiently juicy. It suffered a bit from the same amorphous fuzziness as Coco Noir, if I am honest - it was just neither one thing nor another, and didn't move me. Indeed the first time I tried it it brought on a headache, which makes me wonder if the musks are to blame. Or the bitter almond powder may be putting my sensibilities on edge, for I am not an almond lover at the best of times. This reminds me texturally of Parfums de Nicolai Sacrebleu ie veering towards the suffocatingly dense - sorry, B!

Guerlain L'Art et la Matière Myrrhe & Délires

By contrast, this one was love, though not at first sniff precisely. Steven said I should revisit it after it had worn in for a while, when it was softer and less oddly fruity. This scent shares Belle d'Opium's unusual teaming of peach and incense, yet there the similarity ends, for Myrrh & Délires is far more sheer and luminous...and well, classy. It also has a hint of the suede-like feel of a (less sweet) Bottega Veneta, or Myrrhiad without such a pronounced licorice note. Offbeat, discreet - in short, a smooth operator.

Les Senteurs Gourmandes - a Ronseal range to reckon with

Towards the end of my visit, when I was all but sniffed out, I just managed to romp through the many scents in this budget range of simple fragrances, which typically combined one or two notes (vanilla was a recurring theme) in a straightforward but effective way: I have blotters for Figue Sauvage, Musc Blanc, Tendre Madeleine (a perfume worthy of Proust!), Vanille Pamplemousse, Vanille Chocolat, Vanille Patchouli (a poor man's L'Ombre Fauve), Vanille Orientale and Prune Jasmin, a new release.

(NB For the benefit of UK-based readers, I just noticed that these are available in our very own M & S - fancy that...for £22.50 they are a bargain.)

Louis, the scented hound

No account of my visit would be complete without a shot of the very cute Louis, a King Charles spaniel - is there a Belgian equivalent for the breed? A King Albert II maybe? This perfumista pooch (with apologies to the other Scented Hound) appeared to be the store mascot-cum-doordog, and was surprisingly camera shy for such a friendly animal. Well, maybe it was not so much that as the fact that he simply wouldn't stay still for two seconds!

So as you can imagine, I emerged blinking into the bright sunlight with sated nose and a smile on my face after possibly the most intensive session of niche scent sampling ever undertaken. And it goes without saying that Place Vendôme should figure on every perfumista's road map of Europe. For by the standards of the Belgian road network, it barely even counts as a wegomlegging - and is well worth the trip across The Channel in its own right.

Haute Parfumerie Place Vendôme
Menenstraat 2/A
8560 Wevelgem
Belgium

Tel: 00 32 56 41 24 68

UPDATE - Birgit has since featured Steven Verstraete in her 'People in Perfumeland' series - read the interview here!


Photo of Guerlain Cologne du Parfumeur from Fragrantica, other photos my own

Crash, Bang, Wallop, What A Mention - Bonkers Is In The Daily Telegraph!

By a curious quirk of the Interwebs, my recent review of Lidl's latest fragrance release, X-Bolt for men by G Bellini, was picked up the next day by Harry Wallop, a Features Writer at The Daily Telegraph. He dropped me a line, asking me to get in touch, as he wanted to have a chat about the Lidl aftershave by way of background research for a "fun feature" of his own on the subject.

The finished article can be read here:

I have to admit that it was quite thrilling to be referred to by my surname, like a criminal or some kind of authority figure - you know the way papers do. That distinction is usually reserved for Sibling Bonkers, the "go-to" seismologist to whom the British media turn whenever the Richter Scale nudges 7 and up.

And "metrosexual" or not, I learnt that Harry Wallop himself doesn't in fact wear aftershave himself, but perhaps that is all about to change. For it turns out that Lidl is a purveyor of more than "keenly priced cherry brandy" and an "eclectic selection of sausages". In G Bellini X-Bolt it has pulled off a "rather good apple juice" too... ; - )

For anyone who is interested and who may have missed them first time round, check out these links to my earlier posts on Lidl's female fragrances, Suddenly Madame Glamour (a dead ringer for Chanel Coco Mademoiselle) and Suddenly D'Or (a dupe of Ghost Luminous).


Photo of Daily Telegraph logo from ishabaydhaba.com

G Bellini X-Bolt: Lidl Scores Another Bullseye With A "Bosting" Dupe Of Hugo Boss Bottled For Men

I am sorry my posts have been so sparse of late - now that I have some work again, I sense it will be even trickier to juggle that and the ongoing house renovations. I am mindful that I still haven't written up the remainder of my Belgian sniffing trip, however I was sidetracked the other day by a phone call from my brother. He had just picked up a bottle of Lidl's latest perfume release, X-Bolt by G Bellini. He explained that it was allegedly a copy of the original Hugo Boss for men (the bottle alone is a bit of a giveaway), and was curious to know if I had tried it. I don't think my brother had actually sniffed it himself at that point, because I remember him saying that if it turned out to be awful, it could always be repurposed as bathroom freshener, the fate of Jasper Conran Mister a few years back.

Well, as someone who has tirelessly championed the incredible smell-alike coup which is Suddenly Madame Glamour (a convincing, if somewhat weaker and more watery imitation of Coco Mademoiselle), I had to see for myself without ado, so I picked up a bottle of X-Bolt in my local branch of Lidl yesterday. Then today I nipped into Boots to spray on some Hugo Boss Bottled (to give it its full name), so that I could conduct a side-by-side comparison, albeit on female skin. Which is another reason for posting this right away, while the Hugo Boss is still relatively fresh on.

Hey, I have to say that once again I am very impressed. I don't know exactly what notes I am smelling, other than a vague luminously woody ambery quality and a slightly herbal facet, but I do detect a marked resemblance. The main difference seems to be that when you first spray Hugo Boss, it is soft and refined from the off (as men's designer scents go), whereas the Lidl scent is a little brash at the outset, but quickly settles down.

As you get into the drydown, the Lidl scent has acquired a more elegant character while the Hugo Boss seems to have become slightly more loud. This curious phenomenon may in fact be nothing more than the fact that by dint of wearing off more quickly - or making a bolt for it - X-Bolt has less of that "chemically men's aftershave-y" aspect in its latter stages. It has less of anything to be perfectly blunt. And remains at all times (while it is there at all) vastly superior to any men's fragrance I have ever tried bearing the suffix "Sport". If Hugo Boss Bottled is a 10 I would give X-Bolt a solid 8. I would quite happily sniff a man wearing X-Bolt, despite its naffly butch and somewhat Lynx-esque name; I would think he had dropped some serious cash on this bottle, not the princely sum of £3.99 for 50ml.

So in case anyone is curious here are the notes of Hugo Boss Bottled from the website of The Perfume Shop:

"With fresh, fruity top notes of apple and citrus fruits; warm, floral middle notes of geranium, cinnamon and cloves and base notes of cedar wood, vetiver, olive wood, sandalwood amber and musk."

In the past, I had hell's delight wresting the notes of one of Lidl's first feminine releases, Suddenly d'Or, out of the company's technical department in Scotland (see full saga). I see that Lila Das Gupta, writing about the launch here for Basenotes, has managed to get hold of them - perhaps Lidl has softened its stance on such matters following the huge success of Suddenly Madame Glamour, conceding that public relations is a two way street.

Top - Fresh lemon and limes, the aniseed note of tarragon
Middle - Fresh Fruity apple with a flowery aspect
Base - Vanilla, woody notes and a dry balsamy character

Source: Basenotes

Hmm, comparing those two lists they do seem to be along broadly similar lines. I wonder if the perfumer for Suddenly Madame Glamour pulled off this one too? To get so close to replicating a designer scent of this calibre on a shoestring is a remarkable technical feat, even if it might seem to some like a cheeky manoeuvre.

And as was the case with Suddenly Madame Glamour, X-Bolt has also done a blinder in a blind test, this time involving 108 people. It was carried out in London in June - in Mayfair, I see - so if respondents anywhere in Britain were going to turn their noses up at a cheapo grocery store perfume, it would be there! (Well, assuming they weren't bussed in from other less affluent neighbourhoods, that is - and maybe they were, in the interests of a representative sample.)

Whoever the respondents may have been, they were anything but sniffy...according to this article by PR Newswire consumers preferred Lidl's fragrance over David Beckham Homme (no surprises there...), Dior Homme, D&G The One, and Hugo Boss Bottled. I don't think it can just be coincidence that Hugo Boss featured in the test line up...

Has anyone else out there carried out a side-by-side comparison between the two? If so, let us know in the comments. But I for one am certainly struck by this new star in the grocery store galaxy, this "bossa nova", if you will - or do I mean "bosso novo", with it being for men...? ; - )



Photo of Hugo Boss Bottled from The Perfume Shop, photo of Lidl store from Wikimedia Commons via Clemensfranz, other photos my own

Ergonomic Joy And A Bonkers Interruptus Update

There is nothing like looking at an old “to do list” to fully realise how far you have come.

“Did I pay for train ticket twice?” (what train ticket?)

“Diagnose squeak”

“Another microfibre duvet?”

"Hilary crates"

“Ask fire station re contaminated diesel”

“Say Ryan said wld give me a few pallets”

“If people don’t know whether GCSEs count, shld we tell them?”

There’s even an idea for a blog post in here:

“Eating food with your fingers”, but it may take me a while to recall the exact angle I had in mind with that.

So yes, things have moved on a lot since I wrote those lists, but as regular readers will have noticed, I am still not managing to post very much myself – or read most of my usual set of favourite perfume blogs. This is partly because I am busy addressing the hidden flaws this lovely old house keeps yielding up, and partly because I have been receiving a number of supportive emails back channel with which I am gradually catching up.

But though I am behind on so many fronts, I have a proper desk now, which is a giant leap forward, to come over all Neil Armstrong for a moment. It is technically a table, not a desk, and belonged to a friend’s grandmother – it even boasts an actual indentation shaped like an iron where she used to rest hers face down (which, as a born again lover of antique furniture, I would not recommend). If you look closely at the photo above, you can make out the mark, just down from the succulent. As you might expect, the table also features a robust work surface to – strange but true! – actually PUT MY LEGS UNDER and THINGS ON. Yes indeedy. The sense of wellbeing that descended last weekend when I first pulled up a chair AT the desk was hard to put into words, and was topped off by a rather fine sunset, to which this side of the house is pleasantly prone. Okay, so there are still a few vestigial pink splodges in one corner of the carpet where the radiator valve seeped iron oxide-pigmented sludge the other day, but in the grand scheme of things progress has been made...

So there will be more posts along in due course, including at least one other one from my recent Belgian trip – but for now I will sign off with photos of my new (freshly ironed!) Flittersniffer scarf and the perfume fridges, finally in position in the spare room. (Obviously I pulled the curtains pretty sharpish after this shot was taken!).