A friend has just sent me a link to a remarkable scoop on the UK online satirical news site, Newsbiscuit, dubbed Britain's answer to The Onion by the Laugh Lines Blog of The New York Times. In this article, international soccer superstar and sometime underwear model David Beckham talks about the intensive training he has put in over the years to become a top nose...to go with his killer right foot, "impeccable pecs" and Goldenballs.
I am kicking myself that I managed to miss this before...
And he even mentions civet!
"Speaking to industry journal Heaven Scent, the tabloid favourite exclusively revealed: ‘People think it’s easy...they don’t realise the backbreaking hours of work you have to put in to get this good. The years I spent elbow-deep in civet, coming home stinking of musk and lavender, awash with essential oils. Those were tough days for a young man.’"
Here is a link to the full article. Having now learnt of Beckham's years of dedication to his fragrant craft, I shall certainly upgrade my view of the for Him stable of Intimately Beckham Men, Intimately Beckham Night Men, Instinct, Instinct after Dark, Instinct Ice, Instinct Intense, Pure Instinct, Basic Instinct (I may have made that one up), and a couple of others that boldly broke with the tradition of having names that consistently include the words "Instinct" or "Intimately", typically in a nocturnal setting.
Speaking of instincts...on a whim I looked up my diary entry for the day David Beckham was born: May 2nd, 1975.
The bits I can make out are as follows:
"Moving averages. More scansion. Coal. German conversation instead of German. Mum scalded herself on hot toffee. Vicky wrote in my autograph book."
Should "coal" in fact read "goal"? Could it possibly be a strangely garbled prediction of England's 5-1 win over Germany in 2001, a side captained by David Beckham? And does the reference to my autograph book herald the fact that one day Victoria Beckham, former Spice Girl, fashion designer, mum-of-four and wife of Goldenballs, would launch her own perfume range, including the tellingly named Signature for Her? And might the unfortunate incident involving my mother and a boiling can of sweetened condensed milk presage a future flanker from our husband and wife duo featuring a caramel note?
About as likely as the next Beckham baby being called John, I'd say...
Photo of David Beckham from newsbiscuit.com, photo of Signature for Her from fragrantica.com