Friday, 1 January 2010
A Musky Misadventure And The Virtues of Being Vertical
I am going out tonight with two female friends (the last of the festive shenanigans before I completely collapse from a mixture of staying up till eyeballs-on-stalks-o'clock, drinking too much and eating elderly leftovers). I fully intended to wear Penhaligon's Amaranthine, but managed forcibly to perfume myself whilst not splitting an infinitive (notwithstanding yesterday's disturbing tale of third party acts of fragrance GBH). All I did was pick up a silver atomizer of Ava Luxe's Gardenia Musk to examine the remaining level, whereupon the juice proceeded to dribble all over the desk and both my hands. So there was nothing more for it but to smear my neck in the stuff too and resign myself either to a novel layering experiment later on or a jolly good scrub in the bath.
Up to now I have stored my small decants and atomisers in a recumbent position in a couple of boxes, and it never occurred to me that they might leak while lying down. After all - at the risk of being indelicate - our menfolk typically take a leak in a vertical position. But perhaps my system is flawed after all. Though I am not sure that the atomizers would all stand up nicely if I tried to make them do so, owing especially to their varying heights, and possibly also to their differently shaped bottoms. Plus I would need a specific quorum for them to be packed so tightly that they stayed wedged upright. And the overall height might no longer fit the drawer/fridge shelf where they currently live. And I wouldn't be able to read the labels as readily, which are on their sides.
I'm making a strong case for the horizontal, aren't I? But be assured that the next atomizer that leaks will prompt a major Logistics & Materials Handling review.